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To Atone For Indulgence

Happy Thanksgiving (a day late)! It feels good to be writing again. It’s been a long while ūüôā I’ll talk about that later, but for now, I want to discuss something I’ve noticed for years, but never never felt terribly bothered by….until now.

Compensatory behaviors, especially around food, have basically become the norm in our society: “Oh, you ate a lot yesterday? Better make up for it today!” This morning when I opened up a news page online, the first articles to greet my eyes dealt with “negative calorie foods to make up for yesterday” and “post-Thanksgiving detox diets”.

The message is loud and clear. If you commit the horrid sin of “indulgence”, you must do x, y, and z in order to undo it.

As a survivor of anorexia, that was my life. Except any meal or snack qualified as an indulgence. And I needed to find a way to undo it. All.the.time. This is why I have a fundamental issue with our current mentality of “indulge today, starve tomorrow”.

What if we enjoyed a special meal today and then tomorrow, go back to our normal eating style? Or what if we enjoyed a special meal today, and then tomorrow, enjoyed some of the leftovers? What if we stopped demonizing the enjoyment of good food in reasonable quantities? A quantity that makes our bodies feel good, feel satisfied.

I don’t think God would have made food to taste good if we weren’t to enjoy it ūüėä

“So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”
1 Corinthians 10:31

I think God is most glorified when we thank him for blessings He has given us and enjoy them…and take care of ourselves in the process!


Take care!



To Be Joyful

I remember singing the song as a child, “Rejoice in the Lord always, and again I say rejoice.”¬† It repeated that line, over and over, changing pitch, but reinforcing those words from scripture: Rejoice, always.

I have to admit, joy hasn’t been coming so easily to me lately.¬† I felt drug down by work in a retail,¬† “stuff oriented” setting, especially during the hectic holidays.¬† And I thought I had done well with masking it, at least while away from home during the day.¬† Maybe those less perceptive didn’t notice, but one person did – and she called me out on it.¬† Not in a mean-spirited,¬†“why are¬†you so cranky?”¬†sort of way, but in a “I’ve noticed you haven’t quite been yourself lately” way.

It took me by surprise.¬† It’s not that I’ve been fake towards others – my smile is typically genuine.¬† But I didn’t expect someone who wasn’t my husband, mom or dad, or best friend to pick up on my less chipper mood.¬† And it forced me to think.

Perhaps the retail world is a tough adjustment for me.¬† However, the Bible calls me (us) to live above those difficult circumstances and tough adjustments.¬† Philippians 4:4 reads,¬†¬†“Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!”

If there’s one thing I learned in the Bible courses I took in college, when a word or phrase is repeated in the Bible, it should also have¬†a sign beside it, “LOOK AT THIS!¬† PAY ATTENTION!”¬† We are told¬†two times – TWO TIMES – to rejoice.



So my goal?  Despite my feelings, I will endeavor to rejoice.  Easy?  Maybe not.  Worth it?  I think so.



Moving Forward

One thing that’s easy to forget about? Sometimes, there is ice utterly hidden under a soft, innocent-looking blanket of snow. I happened to find one of these places the other day. It went like this: step, step, wobble, slip, wobble, THUNK. I landed on the pointiest part of my hip, and boy oh boy. Ouch.

So why on earth am I telling you this story? There are two reasons:

1. So that you know that you’re not the only one who falls on hidden ice (unless I’M the only one…)
2. While laying in bed that night, a thought-provoking idea came to mind.

And I had to share.

For those of you who know me or have read any of my other blogs (most recently, here)¬†you know that I’ve fought, and somewhat overcome Anorexia.¬† I say “somewhat overcome” because I still fight it, or at least parts of it – and here is where the rubber meets the road with my little story.

So I’m laying in bed, purposefully on my left side, so as not to cause unnecessary pain.¬† I feel¬†sleepy, but a thought jolts me back awake.¬†¬†This pain I feel in my hip, laying here in bed, isn’t much different than the pain I felt in my hips during my worst days of Anorexia.¬† I remembered the nights of finding¬†just the right¬†position to sleep in that wouldn’t¬†be¬†uncomfortable to my¬†ill-padded hip bones.

To be perfectly honest, I’ve been struggling more with my body¬†and accepting it as it is.¬† Some of those ED (Eating Disorder) thoughts have surfaced. I try to push them back down¬†to where I laid them to rest¬†nearly¬†two years ago.¬† But¬†they can be like dandelions – until every last bit of the root is gone,¬†it keeps growing back.¬† Yuck.

The good news?  God always brings to mind bits and pieces of his word to encourage me.  1 Peter 1:14-15 came to mind:

“Like obedient children, do not be conformed to the desires that you formerly had in ignorance.¬† Instead, as he who called you is holy, be holy yourselves in all your conduct”

In this¬†passage, Peter encourages¬†the reader to be prepared for the time that Christ is revealed by not returning to their old, “ignorant” ways of living.¬† We can all relate to¬†this –¬†regardless of the age we became a believer, there was a time in our life¬†when we had¬†to intentionally choose God.¬† There is an old way that we turned from.

1 peter 1 14

Have you slipped back to some of those old ways?  Mull that over.  And know that God is the only one who can pull you from that pit.

Blessings, and a Happy New Year!


What we Share

The other day, I made this great, easy crockpot meal.  All it took to get dinner on the table?  A few sweet potatoes, an onion, chicken and butter (and a little salt and pepper for fun).  It cooked all day, and made the house smell lovely, and tasted just great.  The next day, I wanted to tell everyone (EVERYONE) about this awesome, easy crockpot dinner.  And then it hit me.

What if I shared the Gospel like I shared this? ¬†What if I had passion and excitement for the truth of God like I did for this sweet potato chicken recipe?¬† I felt ashamed.¬† I can tell every woman I see about this recipe I learned about yesterday, yet I can’t tell a single person about this life-giving¬†Gospel story I’ve known since childhood.¬† There is something wrong with this picture,

Have I made vast improvement in sharing about God since this realization?¬† No.¬† No I haven’t.¬† But perhaps this little post will act as a challenge.¬† Does it challenge you?

Mark 16:15 says, “He said to them, ‚ÄúGo into all the world and preach the gospel to all creation.”¬† All creation.

mark 16 15

What will you share?



Perspective from a Potato

Picture this: I’m standing in the kitchen, pulling the ingredients together for the super awesome crock-pot dinner I had planned for the evening.¬† I grab the bag of potatoes – which has two in it – and discover that one of them is rotten.¬† Moldy.¬† Squishy.¬† I need two potatoes for the recipe.¬† I turn back to the potato drawer and see that there are three little red potatoes left.¬† “Well, I guess that will have to do,” I think to myself.¬† So, I go to work preparing dinner.

A little bit later, a sense of failure washed over me.¬† “Why didn’t you check the potatoes before grocery shopping?¬† That was dumb!¬† You could have gotten more.”¬† I went for a walk (my time to decompress), and realized there are two perspectives to my potato incident.¬† I could see it as a failure – I hadn’t ensured that both potatoes were still edible.¬† Or, I could see it as a moment of resourcefulness.¬† I didn’t have two good russets, so I subbed in what I had on hand.

I think I like that one better.

I think it’s the same way in our walk with the Lord.¬† When he allows us to hit bumps in the road, we have two options: to see it as a bump in the road and cry and moan about it, or we can see it as an opportunity for growth.¬† In my experience, when I can shift my perspective to see life’s difficulties as a chance to grow, the situation becomes more bearable.¬† I have a sense of direction now.

All of this makes me think of God’s discipline.¬† Hebrews 12:7 says “Endure trials for the sake of discipline.¬† God is treating you as children; for what child is there whom a parent does not discipline?”¬† A few verses later, Hebrews 12:11 says “Now, discipline always seems painful rather than pleasant at the time, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.”


So maybe my potato incident wasn’t “discipline”, but I think it illustrates the point of perspective.¬† When those difficulties in life do show up, changing our perspective makes such a difference.¬† Knowing that those difficulties (discipline) will grow us – it makes me feel a lot better.